I’m in a rough spot. Basically starting over. If you want to learn more about my present situation then definitely feel free to give me a call or send me a message.
It’s been incredibly tempting to throw in the towel and run off. Amazing how when the going gets tough, our first reaction is to run – whether that to be to entertainment, alcohol, drugs, sex, or any other form of counterfeit affection – anything that will make us feel loved. I’m happy to say that I haven’t given up – that I haven’t run.
Instead, I’ve pressed in harder. I’ve gained weight and lost sleep. I’ve laid awake stressed at night, eaten a little too much sweet and salty, but I haven’t given up. I haven’t stopped working. I haven’t gotten lazy. I haven’t thrown in the towel. I’ve stayed strong. Stayed the course. Continued to find a way to see the blessings the Lord gives me each day.
I’m a blessed man with an incredible network. You wouldn’t believe the amount of potential opportunities and doors that have suddenly swung open in the aftermath of a couple doors shutting in my face (honestly, by God’s grace). It would have been easy to pack my bags and run. It would have been easy to throw in the towel. But I’ve kept working, kept hoping, kept persevering.
I will not give up. I will persevere.
I’ve found someone worth loving. I know a God worth living for. I have friends willing to go out of their way for me. I have a woman that believes I have the potential to be successful in absolutely anything I set my mind to.
Today, I find myself praying for you, the reader. I know that some of you may not be as fortunate as me – to have that sort of safety-net and community. A family that’s willing to bear some of your financial burden, friends that are willing to meet with you and discuss potential opportunities, a church that continues to pray for you even though you’re considering other church communities; people that refuse to let you give up on yourself, because they haven’t given up on you.
I find myself praying that you’ll know Him. That you’ll come to meet the Savior. The Provider of my strength and resilience. Yes – I’ve stressed myself silly and worried myself into sickness. Yes – I’ve slept poorly and eaten terribly. No – I will not be left in the cold. No – I will not completely fail. No – I will not be left empty-handed.
He’s a good, good father. He saw me estranged and beaten and giving up and He ensured I found a way out. He will provide. I pray you know Him. I pray He meets you where you’re at too.
It’s a struggle. To believe in something you cannot see. To feel something you sometimes are too numb to feel. Life is never easy.
The beautiful, eloquent speeches that some are capable of presenting (whether politician or pastor) are not an accurate depiction of life. But Jesus is an accurate depiction of love. And love is real. It overcomes. It forgives. It forgets your misdirections and gives you another chance – again and again – never giving up – always persevering.
You are the captain of your ship and I the captain of mine. The only one responsible for it’s successful passage through the treacherous waters of life, yourself (and the God you do or do not believe in). Only you can sink the ship.
I’m refusing to sink mine.
I’m a fan of words. A fan of pep-talks. I’ve asked for prayer and encouragement, but I’ve decided its necessary to preach to myself. So here it is. I’m believing. I’m achieving. I’m fighting. And I won’t give up.
Right There With You,